My Life...

I don't know how to express my feeling now.
I feel that I don't belong to here. Either everyone is "alien" or I'm the odd one. I think obviously it's my problem. I just can't find a place that belongs to me or someone who really understands me.

This morning as usual the first thing i do is to look at my phone and hoping for a message from anyone but there is no message at all. I went out to pay a visit to doctor but the clinic did not open. I brought my youngest brother, who followed me along, to have lunch. Nothing much we talked during the lunch. I fetched him home and he continued to play his online game.

Then, I joined a friend to walk around in Mid Valley. Almost 5 pm my friend had to go. Then, I wandered around the mall while waiting for my another friend to come and watch movie with him and his whole family. I saw a lot of couples and families walking around. They were so happy and sweet together. I felt so lonely and envy them.

Finally, it's 6 pm and time to watch movie. I contacted my friend and saw him with his brother, brother's son, brother's wife and their parents. I greeted them and we went in the cinema. He asked me whether I would like to join them for dinner after the movie but I just bade them goodbye and left. I felt that I was disturbing their family day. "Why am I there at the first place?" Should I say "Why am I being brought to this world?" "What is my purpose in this life?"

I'm sure there are people out there who share the same feeling as me now or some time back. I hope someone can help me to find my way back...I'm lost!